Christmas on the Coast: People From New York are Mean and Wear Black

ARE YOU READY, CHRISTMAS ROMCOM FANS?

I couldn’t resist this movie, because the FMC is a grumpy NYC romance author.

We open at a book reading where NY Author is being heckled. Her new novel is crap (in the remaindered bin! *gasp!*) and her mom is nagging her to come home to SC for Christmas.

Her publisher demands “the best book of her life” in 2 months, because oooh they’re so fed up with her bullshitor something. But noooo, writer’s block! (Which everyone tells her is due to her being a hermit who sits in her palatial apartment wearing black and sullenly eating broccoli rather than having enriching life experiences.)

The remedy? A trip to the hometown she sees as a pack of coastal hicks who don’t understand her deeply sensitive writerly ass.

After a few days of acting like an icy princess who loves “asparagus pâté” and all things gluten-free, she gets her mojo back by unflatteringly turning the town’s residents into book characters.

Meanwhile she’s falling for Flannel-Wearing Single-Dad Widower and spending time with his wholesome teenager.

But OH NO, she emails the manuscript to the wrong person! Everyone in town has time to read an 80k Word doc before Author wakes up the next morning, and they’re all pissed. Wholesome Teenager hates her! Tragic Widower is wounded! She slinks back to NY in disgrace.

Does she rewrite the book in three days? Indeed. Is it the best work of her life? Yeppers. Does she run home and interrupt a Christmas event by being a narcissistic monster who takes over the stage to talk about her own shit? Yes, darlings. Does Flannel Widower reward her with his kiss? It wouldn’t be a Christmas romance without it.

🎄Acting: 1/10

🎄Holiday Charm: 2/10

🎄Touching Message: 1/10

🎄Yelling at Your TV: 7/10

🎄Adorable Pets: 1

🎄Adorable Children: 1

🎄Implausible situations, character/detail inconsistencies: ♾

🎄Baked goods: uninspiring

🎄Fake snow quality: N/A

🎄Where to Watch: Amazon Prime